(Montage: A triceratops parallel parks over three hours. A pterodactyl steals the complimentary mints. The valet runs in slow motion, clutching a key fob that doesn’t reach.)
“Tip your valet. Or else.”
“Sir, this is a no-idling zone. Also? I’m going to eat your clipboard.”
“I should’ve worked at Chuck E. Cheese .”
(Final shot: The valet stands alone in the rubble of the garage, holding a single, unscathed “Claim Check #84.” He looks at the camera.)
(Opening shot: Dramatic, Oscar-bait music. A lone valet stands in an underground garage. A T-Rex tries to fit into a compact spot.)
JURASSIC PARKING — This Summer, Validate Your Fear.
